On The Phone

"Hello?" the voice through the earpiece was deep and mellow; groggy.

"Did I wake you?" Slight humor filled the "yeah" that replied. "Sorry, I'm just returning your call. I got off work quite a bit later than I had anticipated." I had hoped it wasn't too late to start a conversation; to fix the things that had been wrong since last weekend.

"Huh," plain and simple; he didn't seem interrested. In fact, I am not scared to suppose he was annoyed, but there was still that bit of humor in its tone -- something you can't shake out of your head when you think about it too long.

"I was just calling to say 'bye'." I don't know why I said it that bluntly. "Ok... bye," I think I had hoped somewhere in side of me that he would remember -- I always seem to have my heart bent on those brightly gilt false hopes -- "Maybe tomorrow or something."

"No... that is why I was calling. You wont see me tomorrow. Or the day after... That's why I'm calling to say 'bye'." I don't think he noticed my pause. He couldn't have, else he probably would have said something other than "ok, bye."

He got me, "... ok." There was a quiver in my softspoken surrender that time.

Something he couldn't have missed. I don't know who hung up first... but I know that there were several seconds of dead air after that. And then I hit the end button and looked at my phone face. It flashed the seconds. Whoever had done it, it happened after that silence. That awkward, annoyed silence. And is it my fault? No. I had told them I was going. I had told him. I hate it. I hate how I hold people up to standards they don't ever seem to achieve.

Now I'm stuck. I know who the people around me are; what they are.... But I end up looking bad.